We all encounter a moment when we can‘t do something. Sometimes it‘s because we don‘t have the money. Sometimes it‘s because we don‘t have the physical ability. Sometimes it‘s because we don‘t live in the correct country. The reasons are many but every time this happens we‘re left longing even harder for that specific thing and feeling tremendously upset for not being able to do it.
When I was young I wanted to become a model. Being only 163 cm (5 feet 4 inches) my prospects weren‘t all that great. In fact, they didn‘t really exist. I was so overwhelmed with disappointment when I learned I wouldn‘t become any taller, that I became furious with everybody and everything. I was mad at the Gods. I was mad at my genes. My mom for being small when my dad was almost 2 meters tall, and on my melancholy went for years.
As I grew older and learned more about the lavishing lifestyle of the model I started to feel grateful. I was grateful for not being tall enough at the age of 14 to be able to become a model because knowing me I would have taken it all the way. At that age I was immature and impersonable and although many young models do just fine, I would have been at a great risk of getting addicted to drugs or falling in with the wrong crowd. That being said I‘m not even sure I would have had a long life had I been able to go in that direction.
This experience has tought me a great deal. It has taught me that some things are not meant to be and that doesn‘t mean the end of the world. It has taught me that sometimes we don‘t know something that we‘ll later come to realize so there‘s no reason to flip the world on its end just because we can‘t do something we really want to. It has taught me that life is full of roads and although one is closed doesn‘t mean that there isn‘t another one just as wonderful right beside it.
Facing a shortcoming of this caliber is truly hard and it will entail a path of some sorrow, but that‘s alright. We‘re allowed to feel sorrow sometimes, we don‘t always have to pull ourselves to the positive side and smile and jump and laugh. Every now and then we can feel sad for a time, but then we have to move on. Lingering in sadness is never a good option and although it can be comforting sometimes, we have to find the power to stand up and continue. We have to do it for ourselves, so that we can figure out how to enjoy life without whatever it was we longed for.
It is hard when you‘re a superior athlete and for some reason you hurt yourself and are never able to compete again. It will hurt, it will turn your world upside down and for a moment or two you won‘t be able to fathom anything being the same ever again, but it will. The world will continue turning, the sun will continue rising and one day you‘ll have a family of your own and you‘ll be watching your kids play your sport full of pride and then it‘ll hit you: Wow, this is even better than what I used to have.
It is hard when you‘ve been longing for a child and you have to face that infertility has decided to rear its ugly head and not allow you to have one of your own. But there are always options; there‘s adoption, there are donor eggs and sperm, there‘s science that is developing at the speed of light. All is not lost even though things aren‘t going the way you had hoped, prayed and wished for.
For us to be able to live a happy existence means having to understand ourselves. We have to understand when to allow ourselves to be sad and when to kick ourselves to continue and move on with our lives. We have to care for ourselves, love ourselves and pat ourselves on the back when we need it. This is our show and we‘re truly going to make it amazing no matter how many times the curtain closes on our current dreams. Cause we‘re just going to dream up something else, something better!