Have you ever felt taken for granted in your relationships? Have you taken care of others needs more than yourself, to the point of exhaustion? Do you find it difficult to say no? Have you struggled with getting yourself heard and acknowledged? If your answer is yes, you are not alone.
Many of us truly struggle with setting healthy boundaries in our relationships. They are the physical, emotional and mental limits we set in our relationships. It helps us decide what is acceptable to us. It helps us say NO to that which is not acceptable to us. Emotional boundaries allow us to protect ourselves from being manipulated, be used or be taken for granted.
Having emotional boundaries means understanding that healthy relationships are based on the ability to say No. It means not having to sacrifice all the time. Healthy boundaries are the most important thing you need to create, especially in the intimate ones.
Learning to set healthy boundaries takes time. It is a conscious process. I would like to share with you three powerful practices that I have personally used for setting healthy boundaries. And it has been worth it!
Practice #1: Know My Limits
Identifying what is acceptable and what is not, is the first step. Often, we don’t even allow ourselves to recognise what our limits are. It takes great amount of self-awareness, self-love and self-respect to acknowledge these physical and emotional limits that we would like to set in our relationships.
Practice #2: Actively Communicate
The most important realisation I have ever had is that people aren’t mind readers, and they may have no clue about what I am feeling and needing. That doesn’t make them bad or selfish. It just makes them human!
Expecting that people would intuitively understand and respect my boundaries, is nothing short of being delusional. It is very important to actively communicate with the others what you are okay or not okay with. Otherwise the person may not even know that they’ve crossed a boundary.
Practice #3. Make Self Care a Priority
This is at the heart of setting emotional boundaries. Taking care of yourself gives you the energy, peace of mind and a positive outlook towards life. When you are internally happy, it gives you a profound sense of freedom and lightness. When you give yourself the permission to have emotions and needs, to set boundaries, to say no, to take care of yourself, your soul feels nourished.
A Power Tip
Learn to say NO without guilt. At the same time, learn to say YES because you want to, and not out of obligation or to please others.
Affirmation for setting healthy emotional boundaries:
I love and respect myself enough to recognize when something isn’t healthy for me, and I am confident enough to set clear boundaries to protect myself. All is well in my world.