Experiencing limitlessness - whether of time and space or of situations (experienced personally or from the other who engenders or neutralizes them) - is significant in broadening experiential and relational contexts. These broadenings create availability or commitment, besides fear and oppression, emptying or allowing humanizing questions depending on their structuring relationships.
It is important to set the limit issue as an impediment or as a support, since it is through this reflection that we can reach openings or ethical limitations and perceive obstacles, commitments, duties, possibilities, and impossibilities.
The imponderable, the impossible, what neutralizes us as agents, as actors, what collapses us leaving us only as spectators and, sometimes, as victims, as receptacles of the emptying of all lived references (death, accident, for example), in short, the unpredictable, is a limit usually experienced as a deadlock, as an unnoticed, fleeting moment. It is what is expressed, for example, as “being lifted from the ground”, it is the immeasurable, deflating one’s own perception of limit. Windstorms, earthquakes, accidents, bombings and, in some cases, the discovery of new faces of family members - the transformation of the familiar into the unfamiliar - can be such terrifying limits that they are ignored. In psychotherapy we hear reports of sexual abuse by parents, which usually create loss of reference, turn relatives into strangers. These are situations that exemplify the annihilation of limits, vanishing the meaning of trusting, believing, or even distrusting, disbelieving, depending on the sequences experienced. This “no limit” - thus generated - is reductive, oppresses, leaves the individual on his/her own, clothed with loneliness, fear, and distrust of all that is familiar, all that is foreign, all that is not himself/herself. This being so, there is an alienation of relational possibilities - autoreferencing - there is only impediment without any possibility of transposition. The experience of “no limit” sets and maintains the annihilating situation.
Equally annihilating is the constant experience of the limit. The rules, the prohibitions made by society and by the family, when not integrated through dialogues, reflections, and analysis, become hindering limits. The daily experience corresponds then to circumventing or respecting the limits. Fear, dread, and cleverness combined with opportunism are landmarks and contexts generated by these limiting adherences, as long as they are distanced from the signs represented. Impediments are created and all responses of acceptance or nonacceptance exile availability, harmony, understanding. In these situations, the limit does strangle.
Both in the constant experiences of limit and in the experiences of no limit, openness to dialogue and presence are fundamental for the recovery of life dynamics. Transpositions that are emerged and questioned; family ties undone, for instance, by affective separations; economic failures; despair caused by family suicides; premature deaths; all these unforeseeable events can create dialogue situations, clarifying rights and wrongs and commitments. When this happens, availability becomes structured; it begins to be realized that the inevitable exists, that the constants are not fixed, that variability is dynamic, that life is dynamic. Perceiving this movement throws the limit to infinity, leaving it as an organization that hovers over everything, no longer as an irreversible case, but as infinite possibilities of being in the world with others. It makes one realize that all impediment can be transformed, overcome, and that all transposition is flexibility, availability, human trajectory.